I do not think that it will come as a surprise to any of you to hear that I am getting married. It is something that I openly talk about and am really excited about. God has brought an amazing man into my life that I am so blessed to even know, let alone get to marry! I want to be the best bride and wife that I can to him. In preparation of being a good wife, I have been studying the differences of men and women so that I can better understand him and how he was made. If I better understand him, than I can nurture and love him in the ways that he needs it most.
I just finished the book For Women Only: What You Need to Know about the Inner Lives of Men by Shaunti Feldhahn. The book is a summary of a few surveys that she has conducted on men about men. She wrote this book in hopes of shedding some light on the inner workings of men and to help women better understand the men around them. It was a short and easy read, and opened my eyes to a lot of the things that I had always been told about men, but never fully understood. There was one thing in particular that stood out to me the most, that I feel needs to be shared with women everywhere. Are you ready? Men want respect. Feldhahn found in her survey that most men would rather feel unloved that disrespected. This is contrary to most women who would rather feel disrespected than unloved. When Feldhahn dug deeper, she found that the reason men wanted respect was because they relate it directly to being loved. When they feel respected, they feel loved.
This is important ladies, we need to understand that LOVE = RESPECT. For men, respect shows that we love, care, and support them and understand their needs. Before reading this book, I knew that men wanted to feel supported and respected but I didn’t realize that they felt unloved if they were not feeling supported and respected. As a future wife, I have taken this knew knowledge and am applying it to my relationship with Chris as well as my relationships with the other men in my life. I want the people around me to know that I love and care about them. And if the men in my life feel loved by feeling respected, I need to be sure that I am showing them respect.
This book has insightful information and I would recommend it to any woman who wants to understand a little better the other half the world. And for those men that are reading, Feldhahn wrote a book for you as well called For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women. I have not read it, but have heard many rave reviews from men that have.
Buy (or borrow) it. Read it. Enjoy the insight that you gain.
God created men and women differently for a purpose. We are here to complement each other; but as a result means that we are different in some ways. Learn the differences, apply them to your relationships, and have more meaningful, intentional relationships as a result.